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| Ryugenkido | |
| | Author | Message |
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Nelia
Posts : 165 Points : 170 Join date : 2010-02-21 Age : 1014
| Subject: Ryugenkido Wed May 26, 2010 11:22 am | |
| Name: Ryugenkido
Manifestation: A dark-haired and bearded man with black dragon claws on his feet and arms. Upon his torso he wears a gold-coloured shirt which flows into a more blue robe.
He has a mask on his face in the shape of a skull. His eyes are red pits of fire that burn behind the mask itself. Upon his right hip rests a sword. He has jewellery on his forehead in the form of an ornate crown similar to that of a Pharaoh. He also wears a pair of long earrings that reach almost to his shoulder.
Release Phrase: Exterminate, Ryugenkido!
Family: Dark/Fire
Level: Bankai
Sealed Zanpakuto: His sword in the sealed state has an elliptical crossguard with a hook at either end. The wrapping of the hilt is red while the hilt itself is made of a dark metal. The blade is long and notched 5 times near the base of the blade. Appart from that it's an extended but otherwise normal blade.
The blade itself is only a foot shorter than Suman himself, an impressive range of 5.4 foot. The blade sometimes has markings on the hilt similar to double crescents on either side of the blade.
Shikai: When released the blade becomes a scimitar with black inlay running up the blade. The hand guard extends to make a black-spiked knuckle duster. Oh, and there's a scimitar at the other end of the hilt as well. This creates something similar to an old aeroplane propeller except much more dangerous.
The style he uses when fighting with this blade is similar to how one uses a quarter staff. However, the blades take up much of the weapon so the handling isn't as good. There is space for two and a half hands on the hilt (which is bound in leather).
Shikai Ability: With this blade, Suman's blade summons shadowfire. Shadow fire is a very special type of fire because it needs no air or fuel to burn. It can be spontaneously generated by Suman. his sword burns with this very fire.
Shadowfire also has another interesting ability: it can burn through almost anything. In Shikai, Suman can burn through buildings within seconds.
Strangely enough, this fire can be doused. It is doused by spiritual pressure captain level and above. Lieutenants can nullify the effects of the fire while nobody bellow a 3rd seat can ever rustle the fire.
Bankai: (Ryunodai Reiji) His bankai makes him a walking inferno. The sword becomes armour with claws on his fingers which are capable of rending human flesh. This armour covers his entire body and protects him from his own flame.
This armour is black with huge spiked epaulettes on each shoulder. The breatplate is relatively unambiguous but the grieves and gauntlets are all spiked. His helm covers his face entirely with four slats in it to see by. Obviously this impairs his vision a little. The helmet has two horns on it also. The boots are clawed on both ends and blend seamlessly into the grieves.
Bankai Ability: As stated before, he gains armour that can resist most attacks. It's strengthened by Suman's spiritual pressure so it equates to an arrancar's heirro. It's about the same strength as a high-ranking Espada's hierro even if it is more brittle and much heavier. Suman's speed is impacted by his bankai although his attack power skyrockets.
The shadowfire also becomes more potent. It's not hot fire this but it eats away flesh and bone and stone. It will eat away most things it touches. Again, only people with sufficiant spiritual pressure will be able to repel the flames effectively. Elites can get within 5 feet of Suman before they have to will the fire backwards.
The fire spreads out according to how Suman is spreading his spiritual pressure. He could do an AoE-type attack that would kill weaklings such as 20th seats and regular hollows or he could turn it into a stream of precise fire that can burn through even a captain-commander's flesh. So fighting style varies on the opponent given. I liken it to either a raging inferno or a flamethrower. Flamethrower is for enemies he's deemed greatly strong and as such, this is his stronger method of fighting. It's known to punch holes through hollows easier than his sealed zanpakto.
The AoE form of fighting is less elegant. Instead of controlling the fire with his hands to make blasts of fire, he simply stands still while the flames extend outwards to reach a full range of 10 meters along the ground. If there's something flamable on the ground this will catch and extend his range. However, he is unable to control the fire once it has ignited. As such, he is reluctant to use this in a forest or similar.
The fire weakens as Suman does. The more spiritual pressure he uses up the weaker his fire becomes. The trick is to tire him out to a point where either his armour can be broken or he can no-longer summon sufficient fire power to burn through flesh.
In summary, he gains extreme attack power in exchange for speed, reishi depletion and quicker fatigue.
Techniques:
Name: Dragon Boomerang Effect: In shikai, Suman can throw his shikai at the enemy and control it with his spiritual pressure. Cutting power is reduced but range is increased by twenty fold (that's 20 meters). It takes half a turn to reach the enemy. At the full twenty meters cutting strength is halved again and it takes a full post to reach the enemy. Duration and or Cooldown: Duration is one throw and cooldown is two posts
Name: Dragon Cannon Effect: Suman fires off a hail of shadowfire at the enemy for double the reishi cost of normal. Baring in mind that it doubles the reishi consumption for the next two posts. He can only use this technique when the enemy is preparing Kido or some form of reishi-based blast. The reishi patterns attract the fire towards the enemy, giving it a much higher hit rate than normal attacks. Duration and or Cooldown: Duration is 1 post and cooldown is 7 posts
Name: Fury of the Dragon Effect: Suman's all-out attack designed for tough opponents.
Suman summons all his remaining reishi and fires it in all directions as one wave. This wave have the same effect of Shadowfire.
When this is used Bankai ends and so does Shikai. He cannot use shikai for 3 posts or Bankai for 7. If he uses Shikai he cannot use Bankai for 10 posts. This attack has a lot of attack power and a range of 100 meters. It destroys buildings, people, hollows and all other races that come into contact with it. The higher the enemy's reiatsu the more likely that they will survive the attack. Certain death awaits those with less than a quarter of Suman's (Lower than a 3rd seat) Duration and or Cooldown: Happens over 1 turn and cannot be used again
Rules in making Techs: 0-119 points: 3 techs 120-239: 4 techs 240-359: 5 techs 360-479: 6 techs.... and so on and so fourth... you can add more techs as your points NOTE: Put if the tech is used in shikai or bankai for the sake of order
Last edited by Nelia on Thu May 27, 2010 10:14 am; edited 3 times in total | |
| | | Rommel
Posts : 50 Points : 30 Join date : 2010-03-13
| Subject: Re: Ryugenkido Wed May 26, 2010 2:06 pm | |
| For the manifestation you need a longer description. What color are the man's eyes? Are there any special things about it? Does he carry any jewry? And other things like that.
For your sealed description just put how long is the total blade and how long is the handle and blade itself are. Also, what kind of sword is it?
In your shikai you state that the "magic" fire can be spontaneously made and needs no air and can burn through walls in twenty seconds. That's a little over the top for my liking even if there is a downside. I would suggest putting a limit on the amount you can summon in your shikai then you might even expand that limit in your bankai. I could accept the burning thing if you made it quite slow and only certain things.
For your Bankai you state that the armor protects you so, does that mean that in your shikai you aren't protected? If so state so in your shikai ability. Also, what does the armor look like? What color is it? What style of armor is it?
For the Bankai ability you can't have people not being able to get within five feet of you. You could speed up the rate and which it burns through things but only slightly. The whole third paragraph seems more like a technique then an ability so if you want to keep it I suggest making it one or doing some fancy writing and some how combining it with one other one.
For technique number one how fast is one throw. One post, half a post?
For the third technique up every bankai cooldown by three and shikai by one. Sense your bankai mainly is about reishi then being able to use it again after such short notice sounds overpowered. Also, instead of saying certain death just put it is extremely hard sense there is no deathblow allowed. When you say "cannot be used again" do you mean in the battle or ever?
There can be no fourth technique sense you can't use this profile and must change it over to the one you made. If you fix what I have asked then I believe I will be able to approve you. | |
| | | Suman
Posts : 15 Points : 18 Join date : 2010-05-26
| Subject: Re: Ryugenkido Wed May 26, 2010 2:17 pm | |
| I shall address each of your points in the form of Numerical points. Here we go:
1: There is a limit on how much fire didn't I say? O_o It's only on the blade itself. The blade is a conductor for the fire and as such cannot go much more than a couple of inches from the blade itself. In other words, it's nothing like his Bankai.
2: The armour only occurs in Bankai.
3: Sound advice. However I did say in the description that people can get within 5foot if they repel the flames with spiritual pressure. the only difference is you have to pour more into the effort the closer you get.
4: The throw I would presume is half a post in speed. If only because I can't make a whole post about throwing his zan.
5: When I say Certain Death I mean that if it hits it's certain death for anyone of that level. Any more and they stand a chance of surviving, the chance increasing with every extra rank. A Captain Commander would sustain some minor burns and maybe some scarring. A captain could die from the major wounds sustained. A lieutenant's prospects look grim. A 4th seat may pull through. Below might as well write their will.
the Technique, once used, cannot be used for the rest of the battle. Furthermore, it cannot be used for three days afterwards as Suman's Spiritual Pressure would need to regenerate.
6: I'll just delete it.
I've edited it to your specifications (I think) | |
| | | Rommel
Posts : 50 Points : 30 Join date : 2010-03-13
| Subject: Re: Ryugenkido Thu May 27, 2010 7:49 am | |
| If you could add a sentence or two to your shikai description and sealed description, that would be nice. Once you finish that you are APPROVED. Just remember not to spam with your AoE attack and you'll be fine. | |
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